Sunday teachers for The Tidepool (nursery-2 years); The Reef (3 years-first grade); The Cove (2nd-5th grade) Volunteers are required to complete application, have references checked, and be fingerprinted. You can complete an application online. Come join in impacting the life of a child for Christ!
Sign Team Members- Students 4th & 5th grade are invited to be part of the new signing team. You will be required to come to rehearsal 2 times a month beginning Jan. 9th at 8:30. You will be learning American Sign Language and some hand motions and become the signing leaders during any of the 3 services in The Cove. All interested, meet in room 1207.
Background helpers: If you have an interest in room set up, curriculum prep, computer input, then this is the position for you.
Contact Norma Huey or call 831.655.0100, x304.
Stop Anger When it Starts
The child who is getting frustrated with a puzzle or struggling with a friend needs to learn how to deal with the building energy inside before exploding. We encourage children and parents to learn to stop. The size of the “stop” depends on the intensity of the anger. Sometimes the stop means engaging in another activity or leaving the situation. Other times it just means pausing for a moment and taking a deep breath. The child needs to recognize that frustration is present and anger is building.
Stopping is helpful whether the child is just becoming frustrated, or is already quite angry. This step is especially important for the child who is enraged. Rage is anger that controls you no matter how well you conceal it. The primary way to tell that children are enraged is that they can no longer think rationally and their anger is now controlling them. They have lost control.
The solution to rage is always to stop. When a child is enraged you might say, “You are too angry to talk about this right now. Spend some time alone. Come back when you can tell me in a calm voice why you’re angry and we’ll continue to talk about it.” One sign that the child is ready to address the issue again is that he or she will be able to put anger into words and talk about the problem rationally.
Whatever you do, don’t jump into the battle with your kids. When they are angry, children look for ways to draw you into a fight. Avoid it. It’s not productive and often escalates the problem. Rather learn how to stop and teach your kids to do the same. By slowing down the process you’ll see a greater ability to interact with your kids without the complications that anger brings.
Come and join the Voyage @ The Cove! On Friday, December 3rd from 6:30-8 p.m. in The Cove at Shoreline Community Church. Set sail for a family adventure that will have everyone talking, laughing, singing, smiling, and exploring God’s Word. Plus, you’ll see clips from the upcoming Narnia film, The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.
Childcare for pre-K and younger is available; please make advance reservations by contacting Norma Huey at 831.655.0100, x304 or nhuey@shorelinechurch.org.
Parents who only focus on behavior change are devastated when their children reveal unresolved issues of the heart as they grow older. The child who steals the family car, the unmarried girl who gets pregnant, or the teenage boy who starts using drugs have one thing in common: a heart problem that’s developed over a long period of time.
The heart consists of thoughts, intentions, motivations, desires, and fantasies. Children play out foolishness in their heart long before it comes out in their actions. Many parents discipline with a two-step process. First, they see wrong behavior and second, they use a number of techniques to get their child to do what’s right. Behavior is changed, but the heart isn’t addressed. A better discipline process requires two more steps, making four altogether.
First, identify the wrong behavior. For example, your daughter begins to complain when you ask her to help with the dishes. Second, identify the dishonoring heart issue. Maybe she has a problem with anger or doesn’t handle instructions well. Third, identify the honoring heart issue needed. She should develop flexibility, giving a few minutes to be helpful. Then, fourth, the right behavior grows out of the honoring heart issue. She could help with the dishes without complaining, or respectfully discuss an alternative. With these four steps, instead of two, you can address what’s going on below the surface-a more complete discipline that teaches children about their hearts.
Giving a consequence isn’t the end of the parent’s responsibility. Sometimes a consequence just gets the child’s attention, allowing the parent then to address deeper heart-related issues. Talk about the underlying motivations and the deeper issues. Helping children change their hearts is harder, but that’s where the lasting change takes place.
The Real Issues are Harder to See
Parents who only focus on behavior change are devastated when their children reveal unresolved issues of the heart as they grow older. The child who steals the family car, the unmarried girl who gets pregnant, or the teenage boy who starts using drugs have one thing in common: a heart problem that’s developed over a long period of time.
The heart consists of thoughts, intentions, motivations, desires, and fantasies. Children play out foolishness in their heart long before it comes out in their actions. Many parents discipline with a two-step process. First, they see wrong behavior and second, they use a number of techniques to get their child to do what’s right. Behavior is changed, but the heart isn’t addressed. A better discipline process requires two more steps, making four altogether.
First, identify the wrong behavior. For example, your daughter begins to complain when you ask her to help with the dishes. Second, identify the dishonoring heart issue. Maybe she has a problem with anger or doesn’t handle instructions well. Third, identify the honoring heart issue needed. She could develop flexibility, giving a few minutes to be helpful. Then, fourth, the right behavior grows out of the honoring heart issue. She could help with the dishes without complaining, or respectfully discuss an alternative. With these four steps, instead of two, you can address what’s going on below the surface—a more complete discipline that teaches children about their hearts.
Giving a consequence isn’t the end of the parent’s responsibility. Sometimes a consequence just gets the child’s attention, allowing the parent then to address deeper heart-related issues. Talk about the underlying motivations and the deeper issues. Helping children change their hearts is harder, but that’s where the lasting change takes place.
This parenting tip was taken from the book, Say Goodbye to Whining Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
