August 30, 2010
Honor Defined in Practical Terms
Children need to know what Godly character looks like in practical terms. We love the character quality of honor, not just because God commands it, but also because it has so much rich meaning for parents and children. It can give direction in many of the frustrating moments we experience in family life. In fact, every form of selfishness has an honor-based solution.
We say honor is…
Treating people as special,
Doing more than what’s expected,
And having a good attitude.
Use our honor definition or make up your own. The point is that honor changes people. It changes the way that parents relate to their children, the way children relate to each other, and the way children relate to their parents. We all need it.
You can use the concept of honor in correction or when things are going well. You can use it when you teach your children about money, time, and other resources, and you can teach it when conflict comes around. One of the best ways to teach it is on special occasions when someone wins a contest or earns a certificate. You may show honor by giving that person a fancy place at the table or by decorating his or her bedroom door.
Honor is fun. It’s like oil in a machine. It gets work done with less friction and less heat. Every family needs honor. It’s great when things are going well and essential when family relationships are strained. You can work on honor whether your kids are preschoolers or teens. It will change the way your family relates.
August 30, 2010
Honor Defined in Practical Terms
Children need to know what Godly character looks like in practical terms. We love the character quality of honor, not just because God commands it, but also because it has so much rich meaning for parents and children. It can give direction in many of the frustrating moments we experience in family life. In fact, every form of selfishness has an honor-based solution.
We say honor is…
Treating people as special,
Doing more than what’s expected,
And having a good attitude.
Use our honor definition or make up your own. The point is that honor changes people. It changes the way that parents relate to their children, the way children relate to each other, and the way children relate to their parents. We all need it.
You can use the concept of honor in correction or when things are going well. You can use it when you teach your children about money, time, and other resources, and you can teach it when conflict comes around. One of the best ways to teach it is on special occasions when someone wins a contest or earns a certificate. You may show honor by giving that person a fancy place at the table or by decorating his or her bedroom door.
Honor is fun. It’s like oil in a machine. It gets work done with less friction and less heat. Every family needs honor. It’s great when things are going well and essential when family relationships are strained. You can work on honor whether your kids are preschoolers or teens. It will change the way your family relates.
July 12, 2010
Teaching Children to Look for Ways to Help
One of the parts of our honor definition is that we do more than what’s expected. That means seeing what needs to be done and doing it. It means solving problems instead leaving them for others. One family had a sign in their kitchen that read:
If it’s broken, fix it.
If it’s empty, fill it up.
If it’s open, shut it.
If it’s out, put it away.
If it’s messy, clean it up.
If you can’t, then report it.
That’s honor.
Take time to teach children that they don’t have to be asked in order to do a job. Honor means that we’re all contributing to family life. In fact, you may ask a child to go around the house and look for one job that needs to be done and do it, then report back to you.
These kinds of discussions and exercises will help children think outside of their little box and discover that they have a responsibility to the family. They can contribute to family life by just seeing something that needs to be done and doing it.
Of course, that’s what makes a valuable employee too so you can teach your children something more important than just how to get along better in your family. You may be preparing them to be outstanding employees as they get older.
July 12, 2010
Teaching Children to Look for Ways to Help
One of the parts of our honor definition is that we do more than what’s expected. That means seeing what needs to be done and doing it. It means solving problems instead leaving them for others. One family had a sign in their kitchen that read:
If it’s broken, fix it.
If it’s empty, fill it up.
If it’s open, shut it.
If it’s out, put it away.
If it’s messy, clean it up.
If you can’t, then report it.
That’s honor.
Take time to teach children that they don’t have to be asked in order to do a job. Honor means that we’re all contributing to family life. In fact, you may ask a child to go around the house and look for one job that needs to be done and do it, then report back to you.
These kinds of discussions and exercises will help children think outside of their little box and discover that they have a responsibility to the family. They can contribute to family life by just seeing something that needs to be done and doing it.
Of course, that’s what makes a valuable employee too so you can teach your children something more important than just how to get along better in your family. You may be preparing them to be outstanding employees as they get older.
• • • • •
Parenting Tip
Teaching Honor in The Bathroom
The bathroom is an excellent place to work on honor. In part, honor means that people do more than what’s expected. They look for things that need to be done and do them without being asked.
For a while, my (Scott) family had a sign by the light switch in our bathroom that read, “Is the bathroom ready for the next person?” All we were trying to do was get our children to turn around and look. Anyone else who walked by the bathroom could see what needed to be done.
Picking up the towel and taking out the dirty clothes were first on the list but we asked each child to think of one more thing to do to make the bathroom a little neater.
Did you remember put the new toilet paper on the roller? Is the sink clean? Are the towels hanging neatly? These are examples of ways that family members can show honor and they probably won’t get any credit or reward for them. This gave us the opportunity to teach our kids that if you do your acts of righteousness before men then you have received your reward, but if you do your acts of righteousness before God then God who sees in secret will reward you openly (Matthew 6:1-4).
God loves honor. Children benefit from learning it, and the bathroom is a great classroom.
This parenting tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
• • • • •
Parenting Tip
Teaching Honor in The Bathroom
The bathroom is an excellent place to work on honor. In part, honor means that people do more than what’s expected. They look for things that need to be done and do them without being asked.
For a while, my (Scott) family had a sign by the light switch in our bathroom that read, “Is the bathroom ready for the next person?” All we were trying to do was get our children to turn around and look. Anyone else who walked by the bathroom could see what needed to be done.
Picking up the towel and taking out the dirty clothes were first on the list but we asked each child to think of one more thing to do to make the bathroom a little neater.
Did you remember put the new toilet paper on the roller? Is the sink clean? Are the towels hanging neatly? These are examples of ways that family members can show honor and they probably won’t get any credit or reward for them. This gave us the opportunity to teach our kids that if you do your acts of righteousness before men then you have received your reward, but if you do your acts of righteousness before God then God who sees in secret will reward you openly (Matthew 6:1-4).
God loves honor. Children benefit from learning it, and the bathroom is a great classroom.
This parenting tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
• • • • •
Parenting Tip
Another Way to Teach Kids Honor
One of the ways that parents can teach honor to children is to include it in the instruction process. You might say, “I’d like you to obey me by setting the table, then I want you to think of something extra to do to surprise me. That’s showing honor. You choose; it’s up to you. Report to me when you’re done and I’ll check your work.”
Surprising parents delights them and focuses on something they want or need. Instructing children to surprise you by doing something extra teaches them to think about your needs and desires not just getting away with the bare minimum. When your child does an extra task, it’s like giving you a gift. Receive the gift with delight. This can be a fun way to teach honor.
Honor involves doing more than what’s expected. All family members need to learn honor and children can learn it when parents teach it. So look for ways to teach kids to do more than what’s expected in daily life. It will not only make family life better now but it will also help kids be more successful as they get older.
This parenting tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
• • • • •
Parenting Tip
Another Way to Teach Kids Honor
One of the ways that parents can teach honor to children is to include it in the instruction process. You might say, “I’d like you to obey me by setting the table, then I want you to think of something extra to do to surprise me. That’s showing honor. You choose; it’s up to you. Report to me when you’re done and I’ll check your work.”
Surprising parents delights them and focuses on something they want or need. Instructing children to surprise you by doing something extra teaches them to think about your needs and desires not just getting away with the bare minimum. When your child does an extra task, it’s like giving you a gift. Receive the gift with delight. This can be a fun way to teach honor.
Honor involves doing more than what’s expected. All family members need to learn honor and children can learn it when parents teach it. So look for ways to teach kids to do more than what’s expected in daily life. It will not only make family life better now but it will also help kids be more successful as they get older.
This parenting tip comes from the book Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes, In You and Your Kids, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
